Homework5 Otto

Analyze This Document

1. Strengths and Weaknesses

After reading this document, I think this is a letter, written by a publisher, who is also as an author, to the receiver who is going to hold the bookseller's show this summer. The main goal of this letter is that the writer wants to know the costs for a booth space at the bookseller's show. The following are the strengths and weaknesses of each sentence.

(1). Strengths: The author uses plain English.

Weaknesses: It is not clear whether the author is asking for the cost or wants to sell books to the receiver.

(2). Strengths: The author appreciates the idea of the bookseller's show and lets them know their advertisement in Publishers Weekly was useful.

Weaknesses: The word "great" is vague.

(3). Strengths: This sentence makes the author and the receiver close.

Weaknesses: This sentence is informal and impolite by using colloquial language.

(4). Strengths: The author shows the goal simply and clearly in this sentence.

Weaknesses: It is too late to show the author's goal now.

(5). Strengths: The author is creative in using his or her creativity to promote the books.

Weaknesses: The word "neat" is vague and this sentence is irrelevant to the goal.

(6). Strengths: I think this sentence is persuasive because the author uses the experience to demonstrate credibility.

Weaknesses: This part should be introduced in the biography instead of in this letter.

(7). Strengths: It is a clear sentence for introducing the publisher and the books.

Weaknesses: It seems to be irrelevant to renting a booth space to sell books.

(8). Strengths: The publisher makes receivers know that he or she is confident and positive to promote the books so that these books sell well.

Weaknesses: It seems to be irrelevant to rent a booth space to sell books too.

(9). Strengths: The author is attentive by considering every possible way to promote the books.

Weaknesses: Not knowing about the receiver's preference on the author's books, the author need not enclose a biography and photo.

(10). Strengths: Points out the specific goal of this letter.

Weaknesses: I think this sentence, which is the goal of whole the letter, should not put in postscript.

(11). Strengths: The author reflects the feeling directly.

Weaknesses: It is irrelevant to the topic.

From the above strengths and weaknesses, we know that the publisher is confident. He or she is convinced the books can sell well. Unfortunately, the author did not pay attention to "you" view and ignored the main goal of the letter. The publisher mentions the books and the career backgrounds, but leaves the question of the cost of a booth space in postscript. Therefore, the entire letter seems to be irrelevant to the topic sentence and improper.

2. Revise this Document

Dear Sirs:

I am a new publisher who wants to attend your bookseller's show this summer, and I hope you can answer my questions: how much for a booth space costs a day and is there any other payment that should be paid.

I think that holding this kind of activity is great because it can help us publishers promote our sales volume and at the same time, can make your organization well-known. The announcement in Publishers Weekly about the bookseller's show is useful because this periodical is famous to booksellers. However, as publishers, we may want to know what the exact charge is because not all the publishers can afford to pay the rental expenses. That way, you may also realize what the publisher's aspirations caused by expenses are.

Besides, because I know that the restricted books are not allowed on public book fair, I would like to introduce my books briefly to let you know more clearly. My books are about arts and paintings. One of my books is called T-Shirt Art. It introduces doing airbrush art on T-shirts. Another one is How to Make Money in the Sign Painting Business. I, as an author, wrote this book to teach interested people to earn money with illustrations designing. Because the books are about arts and paintings which are general books suitable to all ages, it may also attract children and their parents to the show.

Thank you previously for answering my questions and I hope we can cooperate together in the future.

Yours sincerely,